Pigeon
by BloodFromTheThorn
Summary: Tony brings home a friend. Or, how the Avengers got a cat.


_I... I don't even know._

* * *

"Tony what, may I ask, is that?"

"Err, it's a cat. Come on Bruce, you're more observant than that."

"What I meant was, what's it doing in the penthouse of your tower?"

"Oh. I brought him here with me. Or at least, I came up here and he followed me. He's my friend."

Bruce looked around the room in despair. It was empty apart from himself and his fellow avenger and what appeared to be a grey kitten that was currently curled up on Tony's lap purring happily. Beyond the wall of glass New York city continued on sleepily in the quiet of the night.

"But... it's a cat."

"Yes. He's called Pigeon."

"Pigeon?"

"Well, if you want to be technical his full name is Lord Henry Pigeonstalker. Pigeon for short." The billionaire grinned like a child at Christmas, his whole face lighting up with delight.

"And he followed you here?"

"Well... yes. Sort of. I think he's lonely."

"Tony, we're at the top of a very tall building. How exactly did he get up here?"

"I may have had to help him with the elevator a little bit. But he chose to get in it. For a cat he's very intelligent." The fur ball purred more loudly than before and Bruce felt his eyebrows disappearing into his hairline.

"Are you planning on keeping him?" Tony looked shocked.

"Of course! I'm not going to kick him out!"

"But you don't even like cats!" Pigeon hissed loudly at him just as Tony pulled his face into a weird twist of anger and horror.

"I'll have you know that I think cats are brilliant. Anyone that disagrees can get out of my tower," the billionaire informed him, shooting him a questioning look. Bruce just rolled his eyes and lowered himself into the chair beside Tony, reaching out to pet the creature who watched him closely but allowed the contact, starting to purr again.

"I thought Pepper was against pets...?"

"She says that but show her a kitten and she'll melt into the floor. Besides, Pigeon isn't a pet; he's an Avenger!"

"...Right."

"What?"

"Have you been drinking?" He asked somewhat bluntly. Tony did his best to look offended.

"No!"

"Maybe you ought to go and get some rest. You look a little tired." If cat's could glare, Bruce would have been pinned to his seat by now. Tony however just looked contemplative.

"Promise that Pigde will still be here when I get back?"

"Sure thing."

And so it was that Pigeon ended up moving into the tower. As it turned out, Pepper reacted in much the same way as Tony had predicted and immediately declared that anyone who even thought of getting rid of the cat would answer to her. The matter hadn't been brought up again.

For something as tiny as he was, Pigeon was pretty fierce when he wanted to be. He had decided in eight seconds flat that he didn't like Natasha and had taken to hissing at her whenever she entered a room; on days where she was cranky herself she would hiss back and watch in delight as the tiny creature dived for Tony's lap. Barton and Pidge had somehow found themselves in a game where one had to find the other - no one commented on it. Thor, for his part, _loved _the cat. Pigeon however was not so keen. The first time the two had met each other the demi-god had petted the creature so enthusiastically that he had been forced to flee into the vents to avoid being crushed by overzealous patting and since had refused to go within arm's reach.

Bruce and Steve watched the whole situation unfold with bemusement. Neither of them felt the need to intervene - it might actually do them all some good to have a pet around the place. It made it feel more like home.

And, for the first time in forever, they had a failsafe method for extracting Tony from his lab that didn't involve Pepper. As soon as the billionaire heard the high pitched mewling of his favourite feline he would be rushing over to shower the creature in hugs and smiles and kisses. When Pidge had nothing else to do he would follow Tony around religiously - except into the lab. He'd been banned from there after he started nibbling on some wires and managed to put the power out in the entire tower.

Outside of the Avengers, Pepper and a few confused S.H.I.E.L.D agents, no one even knew of the cat's existence, but he was there, purring softly to welcome them home.

* * *

_As said before, no idea where this came from. It's not meant to be taken seriously. Don't question it. I swear I'll update things soon, I know I'm being terrible. _


End file.
